"Do as I say ..." [Chapter 5]: I'm a Better Coach than a Player

Ever see D2, the sequel to The Mighty Ducks? If not, you've missed a great film, and you need to rent it on VHS immediately. If you still own a VCR, that is. Anyway, there's a line in that movie where the kid says to the Emilio Estevez character something like, "You know how you always said I'd make a better coach than a player?"

Well, that line has pretty much been the story of my life. For a long time, I felt that way about basketball. I felt like I understood the game on a technical level very well. I knew how to move without the basketball, how to spread the floor on offense and rotate on defense. I knew how to make solid passes, when to set screens, when to gamble and dive in the passing lanes. I guess you would say that I was blessed with pretty good court vision and basketball IQ.

Unfortunately, that never translated to prowess on the hardwood. I was always a good defender, always a good setup guy, a good role-player. But whenever I was counted on to lead my team in scoring, we usually lost. My shot wasn't that great, and most of the time I was too unselfish with the basketball. I'll never be the offensive star of a team. But I feel like I would make a fine coach.

Well, this is a poker blog, not a basketball blog. As such, you might be able to anticipate where I'm going with this. I've acquired quite a bit of poker knowledge in the short time I've been playing, mostly because poker has become my obsession. I think, speak, and live in poker terminology. I see life as one big poker game full of value bets, gambles, checks, and folds. I feel like I understand the game -- what works and what doesn't. A lot of this has come from reading books and periodicals about poker, and an equal amount has come from simple trial and error. I can come up with a viable solution to almost any situation in poker, given adequate time to think it over.

However, much like basketball, that knowledge is not always brought to bear when I'm in the middle of a game. I know the moves of correct play, I know the rules of bankroll management, etc. ... but I don't apply them. I can tell Billy how he should have played a hand any time he asks ... but that's no guarantee that I would play the hand that way in the same situation. Like in basketball, I make a better coach than a player.

Recently I advised Billy that he might consider working out before playing his next session. That way he could exhaust himself, and take out all his frustration on the weights or the treadmill. By the time he finished, his head would be clear, and the bad beats would be less likely to send him on tilt. I told him I played some of my best poker after working out. So he tried it out, and made a bunch of money that night. Something must have gone right with it, because he's off working up a sweat even as I type this. Must be getting ready for a session tonight.

Now I'm sharing my secret with you as well. Try working out before playing to clear your head. If you saw my bankroll, you would probably laugh at me. You might think of me as a fat personal trainer ... and wonder why you should listen to me. Well trust me, the advice I give you is sound. I just don't always follow it, and that's why I'm broke.

Remember, this is just advice -- you can take it or leave it. But if I worked out more often before my sessions, I think I'd find that I tilted much less frequently, and less severely.

So like always, do as I say, not as I do ...